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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27554725">Cutie Carriers Cooperative</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/fae_fire/pseuds/fae_fire'>fae_fire</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>EXO (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crack, M/M, Mpreg, No Sex, but the language is vulgar</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 03:22:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,903</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27554725</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/fae_fire/pseuds/fae_fire</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Baekhyun, Kyungsoo, Junmyeon, and Jongdae formed a pregnancy support group. It started with Jongdae. Though, actually, it started with Minseok who had the brilliant idea that Jongdae should hang out with other pregnant carriers since he felt rather alone when they were expecting with their first child. It’d be nice to be close to people who could connect to you, you know?</p><p>Bekhyun demanded they be named something on their first quote-official-unquote meeting. Cutie Carriers Coop., he had insisted.</p><p>Jongdae was nice enough not to point out that it sounded like they were a bunch of chickens.</p><p>Junmyeon thought it was clever to have the same first letters for the name.</p><p>Kyungsoo was too distracted by the red velvet crinkles cream cheese sandwich type thing on the table to care.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Byun Baekhyun/Oh Sehun, Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai, Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai/Park Chanyeol, Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Park Chanyeol, Kim Jongdae | Chen/Kim Minseok | Xiumin, Kim Junmyeon | Suho/Zhang Yi Xing | Lay</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>113</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>#𝓑𝓪𝓫𝔂𝕄𝕒𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕱𝖊𝖘𝖙𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟎</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Cutie Carriers Cooperative</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Code: BMF186/2020<br/>Pairing: Chanyeol/Jongin/Kyungsoo, Sehun/Baekhyun, Yixing/Junmyeon, Minseok/Jongdae<br/>Carrier: Kyungsoo, Baekhyun, Junmyeon, Jongdae<br/>Pregnancy: Pre/During Pregnancy<br/>Babies: Any of the two (Only one or more than one)</p><p>Prompt:Baekhyun, Kyungsoo, Junmyeon, and Jongdae form a pregnancy support group, but it basically turns into a weekly meeting to complain about their husbands, except for Jongdae who has a hard time complaining about anything, because he's such a positive person. He's mostly there for the stories and the snacks. </p><p>A/N: TO THE PROMPTER: I'm sorry I changed the prompt a little because as I was writing I didn't notice some were mixed up and caught it only later on! Sorryyyy, I hope you still like it!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In a one-story house in the suburbs, lights streams in from a picture window, arched at the top to give a very fairytale feel. It’s nestled next to a cushioned ledge, the dream of every book-reader: from the perfect lighting to the comfort, added with beautiful scenery.</p><p> </p><p>It’s where Jongdae usually spends his days de-stressing, not that he’s stressed about a lot. Minseok, his husband, is perfect, always a dear. He rubs a hand over his bloated stomach, 7 months in.</p><p> </p><p>Regularly, he’d take care of his and Minseok’s eldest – a girl they named April (this next one they’ll name after a flower). He’d stay at home and make them meals, take her to school and pick her up. He reads other people’s work for a living as an editor, and he usually parks his butt by this window for that.</p><p> </p><p>On Saturdays, it’s different. It’s filled with a noise other than Moana playing in the background for the umpteenth time.</p><p> </p><p>On Saturdays, it’s filled with Baekhyun wailing, “I just wanna get fucked, you know?”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Look. Baekhyun does. He wants, no, <em>needs</em> to get fucked. It’s been so long – so, holy mother of God, forgive him for using Your name for very sinfully lewd thoughts, long but he <em>misses </em>getting dicked down.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s just so frustrating, you know?” he sniffs. Never in his life has he ever thought that he’d cry for cock, but that’s where he is now. Who wouldn’t over a dick like Sehun’s anyway? “Am I not cute enough? I try to keep myself in shape too! Am I not pretty, Kyungsoo?”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo sighs, inhaling the spinach and cream cheese pita Junmyeon took the time to order for them. “You’re beautiful, Baekhyun.”</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun flips his short hair mid-anguish. “You’re right. It can’t be that.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo side-eyes him, but at this point, he’s gotten used to the carrier with the bubble gum pink hair. He can’t lie to him, though. Baekhyun is undeniably p(r)etty.</p><p> </p><p>Jumyeon walks in – <em>waddles</em>, they all waddle. They all look like a bunch of penguins when they walk around. Jumyeon <em>waddles </em>in, tucking his phone back in his breast pocket.</p><p> </p><p>And that just tells how rich Junmyeon is. Who even uses breast pockets?</p><p>“It can be a number of things, Hyunnie,” the eldest of them says. “Yixing won’t even do it with me until it’s dark so we can light up about 16 candles and an incense in the room.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo does a spit take.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, God,” Jongdae laughs. “Why??”</p><p> </p><p>The lines under Junmyeon’s eyes are prominent. “Why does my husband do anything? Eight years together and he’s still so foreign to me sometimes.”</p><p> </p><p>“Hyung,” Kyungsoo says, eyeing the brownies Jongdae baked. He’s had three, contemplating if he can have his fifth. “Does he dance in circles too?”</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae snickers, moving to sit on the arm of the sofa Kyungsoo is occupying, wrapping a loving arm on their youngest. “Yeah, does he chant unintelligible words under his breath?”</p><p> </p><p>“Y-yeah?” Junmyeon tilts his head. Yixing used to be a dancer, and when they cuddle, he would whisper to their baby but Junmyeon can’t make anything of it. It’s probably in Chinese. “I g-guess he does.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo and Jongdae share a look, and then give him twin teasing smiles.</p><p> </p><p>“Are you sure he’s not summoning the devil?” Kyungsoo offers.</p><p> </p><p>“Sound pretty occult to me,” Jongdae adds.</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon colors. “Of course not! Yixing is an angel!”</p><p> </p><p>He wouldn’t!</p><p> </p><p>…<em>right</em>?</p><p> </p><p>“All right, all right, all right,” Baekhyun interferes. He transfers to sit on Jongdae’s sturdy coffee table in front of them, its edges child-proofed. “Yixing isn’t summoning some supernatural entity, he’s just weird. But what about me? What am I going to do about <em>my</em>, very valid, very serious problem?”</p><p> </p><p>They stare at him.</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun grumbles. “C’mon! Nothing? I tried <em>everything</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>“Well if you tried everything, then how can we help you?” Jongdae shrugs, rubbing his belly.</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know? How’d you get your husband to sleep with you?”</p><p> </p><p>“I ask.”</p><p> </p><p>“How about you, Junmy–” Baekhyun stops. “Actually, I don’t want to know.”</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon splutters.</p><p> </p><p>“Kyungsoo, you would know, right? You have two partners! So that means you have to keep them twice as interested. Teach me your ways, please.”</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae pinches Kyungsoo’s cheeks filled with his sixth brownie. The ever-hungry carrier doesn’t know what to tell Baekhyun, in all his honesty. He’s mainly here for the snacks, and his sex life was so far back in his problems list, it probably isn’t one.</p><p> </p><p>“I get on the bed naked,” Kyungsoo says, <em>after</em> he swallows. He’s always hungry, sure, but he doesn’t have to be a slob about it.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun, Kyungsoo, Junmyeon, and Jongdae formed a pregnancy support group. It started with Jongdae. Though, actually, it started with Minseok who had the brilliant idea that Jongdae should hang out with other pregnant carriers since he felt rather alone when they were expecting with April. It’d be nice to be close to people who could <em>connect</em> to you, you know?</p><p> </p><p>So Minseok sets it up on Saturdays and since he was friends with this customer from his coffee shop who had a pregnant partner as well, it all worked out. Junmyeon was roped in.</p><p> </p><p>One very convenient day, Jongdae re-meets Baekhyun, who was his old friend in High School. Jongdae remembers Baekhyun, but not Sehun, having transferred schools the year Sehun enrolled. They’ve lost touch but apparently Baekhyun and Sehun are pregnant for the first time, so Minseok invites Baekhyun too.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo… well, he was out on a secret coffee run because Jongin never lets him have coffee. He used to go to this café every Saturday because that’s the only time he can be bothered to sneak out. Minseok invites him to his husband’s weekly support group.</p><p> </p><p>Bekhyun demanded they be named something on their first quote-official-unquote meeting. <em>Cutie Carriers Coop.</em>, he had insisted.</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae was nice enough not to point out that it sounded like they were a bunch of chickens.</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon thought it was clever to have the same first letters for the name.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo was too distracted by the red velvet crinkles cream cheese sandwich thing on the table to care.</p><p> </p><p>So here they are, three weeks in, acting like they’ve known each other all their lives.</p><p> </p><p>It’s easy, considering that somewhere along the line, it’s basically turned into a weekly meeting to complain about their husbands (except for Jongdae who has a hard time complaining about anything, because Minseok’s just <em>fucking perfect.</em>)</p><p> </p><p>Isn’t that just <em>wonderful</em>.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>His family comes home when he’s back on his ledge, sneaking some more work in before he has to start on dinner.</p><p> </p><p>The click of the door is followed by the smell of Chinese takeout, but before he can even see Minseok, April is charging him down like a bulldozer.</p><p> </p><p>Luckily, the little girl is light and only goes up to his legs. “Appa, I missed you!”</p><p> </p><p>She’s a wonderful girl, with Minseok’s eyes and Jongdae’s smile. They’ve taken to calling her Kitten.</p><p> </p><p>“I missed you too, Kitten,” Jongdae rightly says.</p><p> </p><p>Minseok gives him a wink as he heads on to the kitchen, where he can properly put their food in real plates and temporarily put the take out containers to the side for recycling. Jongdae holds his daughter’s hand as they follow. The smell has made him hungry. It’s amazing how Minseok knows him so well.</p><p> </p><p>Minseok orders their daughter to put away her things and wash up so they can eat. She rushes to her room where she can neatly stash away her Mike Wazowski backpack. Meanwhile, Jongdae sits and waits for Minseok to finish preparing their food.</p><p> </p><p>“Did you have fun today?” Minseok asks, even though he knows Jongdae always has fun during these support group sessions. “Anything new happened today?”</p><p> </p><p>“Sehun still won’t sleep with Baekhyun,” Jongdae coins, sneaking bites of orange chicken in. He knows it irks Minseok. For the most part, he just lets Jongdae do anything he wants. “Yixing might be a cult leader, and Kyungsoo has put on a little weight.”</p><p> </p><p>Minseok latches on the third – because the first is nothing new, the second is fair. He gives Jongdae a sweet smile. “So have you, honey, and it’s nothing to fret about.”</p><p> </p><p>“I know,” the carrier huffs. Minseok’s always like this. He’s so sincere about it that Jongdae can’t even get mad that he was called fat. “He’s just so cute, you know? I can’t help but want to squeeze him everytime.”</p><p> </p><p>Minseok laughs.</p><p> </p><p>“How about you, what did you do today?” Jongdae coins. He sneaks more bites of the chicken. He sees Minseok’s eyes flit to his hands, and acts like he didn’t see.</p><p> </p><p><em>Ugh</em>.</p><p> </p><p>“Took April to my parents. Got scolded because they don’t know how serving coffee is going to get her and our new baby through college. Same old.”</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae alarms. “And? What did you tell them?”</p><p> </p><p>Minseok grins. “I said, ‘I don’t know about you, Ma, but the only thing that got me through college <em>was</em> coffee.”</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae rolls his eyes. <em>Ugh</em>, his husband is too perfect.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Perfect.</p><p> </p><p>That’s what coffee in the mornings is to Minseok. As warm as a hug, almost as tasty as Jongdae’s kisses, it’s enough to make him let go of his parents’ constant berating.</p><p> </p><p>It’s not like Minseok never wanted to tell his parents that he actually <em>owned </em>the coffee shop he’s working in, but he wanted the news to be a surprise and when his husband accidentally let it slip, Minseok supposed that it wasn’t worth it since Jongdae found it really funny when they stress out over nothing.</p><p> </p><p>He’ll do anything if it gives his husband even the littlest bursts of joy.</p><p> </p><p>He’s wiping down the counter when Xing-Xing walks in, constant dimpled smile on his handsome face. Minseok gives all of his customers cute nicknames… at least the ones worth remembering. He nicknamed Kyungsoo as <em>the one with the moshi cheeks</em>.</p><p> </p><p>“Good morning, Xing-Xing! What can I get you today?” The guy has been a long time customer of Minseok. He comes in for the coffee and leaves for the tea. He’s seems spaced out most of the time, but never means any harm.</p><p> </p><p>“Good morning, Seok-Seok,” Xing-Xing greets. Minseok cringes at it, but lets it slide. He can’t actually do much more explaining after the initial ten. He taps his chin with a finger and hums. “I’ll get my usual black, but I was thinking something for Junmyeon today. I think he’s been anxious lately and the constant chamomile might be getting boring. Are there any other flavors you can recommend?”</p><p> </p><p>Minseok mimics the action. Minseok appreciates how much the man cares for his pregnant husband. “Well, Lavender smells nice, so you can start with that, so as Rose. If Jun’s stressed from work, then Ashwagandha may help him better, and also Passionflower at night. Turmeric has medicinal benefit. Ginseng too, though maybe Fennel’s more traditional. If you want something with a refreshing taste, then Peppermint or Lemon Balm.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll take ‘em all,” Xing-Xing’s says, eyes lighting up brighter than the sun.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Nothing can be brighter than the sun today.</p><p> </p><p>He’s had his morning jog outside, had a cup of wonderful coffee, enjoyed the view from him the second-floor window while lifting weights, took a long relaxing shower in the showers he owns – since he does, technically, own the whole building.</p><p> </p><p>Yes, a good day starts with the brightest of suns, and as Yixing breathes a whole lungful of air, he breathes the carbon dioxide out with open arms. It’s his silent gratitude for the trees that supply the people he loves with oxygen.</p><p> </p><p><em>Cycle. Balance. Importance</em>.</p><p> </p><p>On his way to the stairs, sharp muscle catches his eyes. Toned arms and toned complexion, his cheeks dimple at the sight of a friend.</p><p> </p><p>“Jongin! You’re early,” he greets. He slaps the man on his butt, totally free from any malice.</p><p> </p><p>Jongin laughs. He’s got a beautiful smile and a very handsome face, silver hair already plastered on his forehead. Yixing’s glad Jongin chose to regularly come to his gym. Jongin brings in the girls… and the boys.</p><p> </p><p>“Dude, you got to stop doing that when I’m lifting,” Jongin says, emphasizing his point by doing another rep. “Next time, I might drop this on your foot.”</p><p> </p><p>Yixing waves him off. “I haven’t seen you in so long, I missed you, man,” he explains. Then, he leans in conspiratorially. “The way I see it, I’m not the only one.”</p><p> </p><p>Jongin leans back a little to see a girl on the treadmill watching him. Her eyes blow wide as she’s caught and immediately goes back to minding her own business. Jongin lightheartedly rolls his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“Becky’s harmless,” he says. “Besides, I had a lot of shoots in the morning lately so I’ve been coming late. You’re the one who isn’t around.”</p><p> </p><p>Yixing gasps. “Jongin, no!”</p><p> </p><p>Jongin gasps too.</p><p> </p><p>“You should take care of your husband at night!” Yixing berates. “Now that you’re pregnant, you should spend time together not just for your relationship, but also for the baby. When the baby feels love, they will come lovely.”</p><p> </p><p>Jongin sighs. His cute pout makes an appearance. “I know, hyung. But I need money to feed him, you know? Since being a head chef is uber stressful and we’ve been trying to keep him from there as much as possible.”</p><p> </p><p>Yixing nods his head in understanding. Not everyone can be married to a businessman who owns a perfume line and is secretly an heir to an art dealership empire, but Yixing supposes he just got lucky. He places a consoling hand on Jongin’s still bulging bicep.</p><p> </p><p>“Tell you what, my <em>dì di</em>, I can tell you ways on how to strengthen your relationship with your husband while expecting, and you can tell me more about these secrets your chef-husband holds,” Yixing offers.</p><p> </p><p>Jongin’s face lights up in delight. Yixing wonders if he even remembers he’s been holding up 20-pound barbells in each hand since they’ve started talking. Yixing unequivocally appreciates Jongin.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon completely appreciates Yixing, he does. He swears he never wants to get married and knocked up by absolutely anyone else in this lifetime or the next.</p><p> </p><p>Well, okay, maybe if in some alternate universe Chris Evans and his juicy ass had interest in him, maybe – <em>maybe</em> – Junmyeon would reconsider.</p><p> </p><p>But this is his universe, and Junmyeon wouldn’t replace Yixing for anyone even if they courted him with a house full of flowers and a world of cold, hard cash.</p><p> </p><p>He already has those.</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon just cannot fathom why Yixing has to be as weird as possible regarding his pregnancy.</p><p> </p><p>“Honey, I’m not weird,” Yixing tells him as he sits them down in front of their Smart TV. It was streaming a Youtube video of some British game show because according to Yixing, it was <em>funny </em>and <em>informative</em>, and they want their baby to be <em>happy</em> and <em>smart</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon’s tired from work. Being the pregnant Internal Director of a company may be inspiring for all Discriminated Carriers™ everywhere, but it was also a big pain in the ass… and feet. God, why does being pregnant such a heavy burden on feet? Yixing isn’t much of a help for his stress, either.</p><p> </p><p>“Yixing, you are,” Junmyeon emphasizes. Maybe once his husband accepts his absurdity, they’ll be able to tone it down a little. “But that doesn’t mean I love you any less.”</p><p> </p><p>“I love you too, Myeonnie!” Yixing beams.</p><p> </p><p>For a whole two minutes.</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon knows because they have a digital clock under the suspended TV and the red number on the minutes place has gone up twice.</p><p> </p><p>Then, Yixing says, “But I’m not weird.”</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon sighs. At times like this, he feels hopeless. He loves Yixing. Yixing is the Ying to his Zhang – <em>Yang</em> (hehe, he should write that down, that one’s funny). Yixing was supposed to be the right amount of absurdity in his otherwise bland world of grey suits and black ink on white paper. So he does nothing, really, but indulge the man as he turns down the lights and switches the TV to a Chinese station. The images that gently fade in and fade out are that of animals in farmhouses. A woman’s soothing voice flows in the background.</p><p> </p><p>Yixing picks up the scented candles and lights them. Then, he places them on the floor, equi-distant to each other to form the corners of a square.</p><p> </p><p>And that’s when it hits Junmyeon. His mind flashes back to that one time Yixing asked him about giving birth next to sheep. Like any other sane human on the planet, he screamed <em>NO</em> but otherwise thought nothing of it.</p><p> </p><p>The room is dark and the dim lights feel like fire cascading down, he cannot understand the words being chanted in the background, and he’s sat in the middle of the room, by the foot of their bed.</p><p> </p><p>They have a round rug, ominously red. The candles just outside its circumference, mocking him with their alluring scent.</p><p> </p><p>It feels like… no, Junmyeon must be going insane – is… is this some kind of ritual?</p><p> </p><p>Yixing opens the door.</p><p> </p><p>“Where are you going?” Junmyeon almost panics.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m going to get you tea,” and his smile is nothing but intimidatingly sincere. “I promise you it’ll send you to <em>heaven</em>.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“Heaven! That’s what he said! Heaven!” Jumyeon cries, breathing in a paper bag that’s now disgustingly wet with his spit.</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae rubs his back consolingly. “There, there,” he says. He’s being a little coy about it, though. “You can’t say we didn’t warn you.”</p><p> </p><p>“He’s still my husband, Jongdae-yah,” Junmyeon insists.</p><p> </p><p>“Doesn’t mean he can’t be an advocate of Nyarlathotep, Junmyeon-ah,” Jongdae debates.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh my god… <em>oh my god</em>,” Junmyeon cries. “What if you’re right? What if Yixing <em>is </em>some weird cultist and my baby is the child of a god and is the catalyst for the end of the world? I can’t have that! We’re just about to release a new line of baby powder – it’s going to be too soon – <em>OH MY GOD!</em>”</p><p> </p><p>“That’s ‘oh my Nyarlathotep’ to you.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo slaps both of them for their silliness. “Don’t tease him, Jongdae. He has enough stress from the baby, his husband, and managing half of the businesses in the city.” He takes the paper bag away from Junmyeon. They don’t need to be any more of a sitcom than they already were. “Now, why don’t I make some tea to calm us all down? I’m sure that’d go great with the biscuits and cake I made for us today.”</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon shudders; the suggestion makes images flash quickly before his eyes. <em>PTSD</em>, some would call it. “It was horrible, Jongdae,” he recalls, voice reminiscent and frightened. “Tea never tasted more vile.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo nevertheless heads to the kitchen, setting water to boil in a pot. He opens the many cupboards of canned goods, food supplies, and probably the most extensive cereal collection he’s seen – and he’s been to the supermarket. The Kims’ spice rack challenges that of a professional kitchen’s, and Kyungsoo verbalizes his amazement to Jongdae.</p><p> </p><p>It’s not that they cook well – Minseok just liked to have everything around for when Jongdae gets a craving, Jongdae tells him as Kyungsoo finds several flavors of tea canisters behind a cabinet, all neatly aligned and arranged first by brand, packaging, color, and then in alphabetical order.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo pulls the water off just before it boils, and fills four cups. “Isn’t he perfect,” he absentmindedly comments.</p><p> </p><p>“He is,” Jongdae knowingly grumbles.</p><p> </p><p>This is the scene Kyungsoo goes back to: it’s a drab afternoon, the skies grey as rain falls against Jongdae’s picturesque window. Gazing outside is Baekhyun, unusually melancholy in an oversized sweater and maternity pants. He’s motionless, for once, and it tugs on Kyungsoo’s heart strings (which he has, no matter how many times he denies it).</p><p> </p><p>Because the thing is, as he hands Jongdae and Junmyeon their cups of tea, while Jongdae finally starts to sincerely calm Jumyeon down and bring back some semblance of logic in his lovelife, he realizes that this group is here for each other. They feed him anything he wants and they get to annoy him with their woes. That’s the give-and-take. That’s what this friendship-coop is for.</p><p> </p><p>He silently hands Baekhyun a mug, snapping the latter from a daze. Kyungsoo sits beside him, closer than what he would’ve been comfortable with just a couple of weeks ago. “You okay?”</p><p> </p><p>“Not really,” Baekyhyun sighs. It was never really hard for him to open up to Kyungsoo. “I really don’t know what to do anymore, Soo-yah.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo simply waits for him to continue.</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun turns to him. “I made him dinner yesterday night, right? ‘Cause on Fridays, he doesn’t have to get up at 6AM. So I made him dinner and lit up candles for when he gets home. It goes swimmingly. We never really go on dates anymore because he works too hard, and it was nice to finally spend time with him like that again.” Baekhyun sniffles. “But even then, he won’t sleep with me. Straight to the bed, a kiss on the forehead, and a ‘goodnight, Baekhyun.’ That’s it.”</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun clutches at his mug a little tighter. In the smallest voice that has no place in Baekhyun’s life, he asks, “What if he doesn’t love me anymore, Kyungsoo?”</p><p> </p><p>It’s so uncomfortable, to see the lively carrier like this – vulnerable and unsure of himself. It doesn’t suit him at all.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo pinches him on the cheek for it.</p><p> </p><p>Bakhyung screeches, tears on the corners of his eyes. “What the fu–”</p><p> </p><p>“You’re insane,” Kyungsoo says, unwilling to give Baekhyun that chance to talk, at least not until he’s back to his normal self. “If for one second you even think that someone is unable to love <em>the </em>Byun Baekhyun, I’m gonna have to get you checked into the mental ward ‘cause you are insane.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo puffs his cheeks and scrunches his nose. He’s adorable when he continues, “You can’t just say he doesn’t love you anymore, you haven’t even asked him why he won’t have sex with you.”</p><p> </p><p>It’s so simple, Kyungsoo makes it sound so. Baekhyun can’t help the smile on his face.</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll give it a shot, then?” he says, because really, what else can he say?</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo nods, easily accepting. Then, after a few silent moments of tea-sipping, he demands, “I want burgers for dinner, with onion rings and cheesy fries.”</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun finally laughs.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun finally laughs, after what seemed like minutes of Kyungsoo talking – <em>ranting</em> – to his newfound friend about his newfound hobby.</p><p> </p><p>“You asshole, stop, I am <em>depressed</em>,” Kyungsoo laments. He’s gone through a box of tissues already.</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun snorts. “<em>You’re just so cute, you know?</em>” he says through the phone. “<em>You didn’t cry like this when you thought Armin died, and I thought you were hysterical then.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>“We. Do. Not. Talk. About. That.” The venom in his voice is dripping, mostly because while he admits that he was heartbroken when he thought Armin died, the embarrassment about crying like the world was ending was worse.</p><p> </p><p>“You don’t understand,” Kyungsoo weeps into the phone as if the Universe was about to implode. “They’re third years, Baekhyun-ah, they can’t be part of the group anymore. I don’t think I can handle life without Nozomi.”</p><p> </p><p>Once they knew of his pregnancy, Kyungsoo had to stop working as the head chef of his own restaurant. It wasn’t because he couldn’t handle it – au contraire – Kyungsoo thought that he can handle things just fine. It’s Chanyeol and Jongin who forced him not to. So he took three months to train a head chef and a sous chef and left the restaurant’s management to Jongin and Chanyeol, supervised by Kyungsoo.</p><p> </p><p>Let’s be honest. He can’t really leave those two to manage anything by themselves.</p><p> </p><p>(Which is a lie, they’ll insist. They managed to get Kyungsoo into their bed.)</p><p> </p><p>That left Kyungsoo with a lot of time in his hands he had no idea what to do with. It’s not like he had much other friends to begin with. Being the only carrier in a polyamory relationship with two other tall, beautiful, muscular, and talented men made him the object of many envious men and women alike.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn’t care; at the end of the day he’s the one who’s getting hotly double dicked.</p><p> </p><p>The thing is though, no one told him that mood swings and anime do not mix, but he’s gotten in too deep already there’s no possible way he can stop.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>You’ll be fine, Kyungsoo</em>,” Baekhyun consoles him, “<em>if you got through Attack on Titan and its non-existent happy moments, then you can get through </em>Love Live!.”</p><p>
  
</p><p>Kyungsoo sniffles. At times like these, he misses Baekhyun even if they’d only seen each other three days ago. Baekhyun has an easy aura about him, and while the latter gets to complain about his struggling sex life, Kyungsoo gets to wax poetic to him about how Furihata Kouki deserved more screen time and how he is a total fit for Akashi Seijuro.</p><p> </p><p>“I miss you,” he laments, unthinkingly. His voice is mellow and delicate. It happens often enough when he’s drowsy from anime tears and exhausted from constant mood swings. “I wanna be where you are, Hyunnie. You can hold my hand while we watch TV.”</p><p> </p><p>“Kyungsoo?”</p><p> </p><p>The carrier startles. He drops the call and turns the TV off. He spins, and there’s Chanyeol, face crumpled into a frown. “Who were you talking to?”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo shakes his head and scrunches his stuffy nose. “No one,” he hides. There are a number of reason why he will never tell Chanyeol and Jonging why he cries to Baekhyun about anime. Okay, there’s only one, but it’s a totally valid <em>one</em>: They’ll never let him live it down.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol opens his mouth and he’s got that doubtful look in his eyes. Kyungsoo just knows Chanyeol wasn’t about to let it go, so he beats him to it.</p><p> </p><p>“Welcome home, Love,” he greets, waddling close and getting on his tippy toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. He knows Chanyeol loves moments like this, when Kyungsoo is unguarded and soft. “I’ll get started on dinner right away.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol grins and wraps his hands around Kyungsoo. He pushes him back to the couch where he sits Kyungsoo on his lap. “No need, Love,” he says, snuggling into Kyungsoo’s neck, seemingly over the earlier suspicion. “Jongin said he’s bringing home food.”</p><p> </p><p>“You should’ve said no,” Kyungsoo readily grumbles, comfortable and content in his perch.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol merely laughs. His big hand rubs Kyungsoo’s belly soothingly. “I’ll get you anything you crave for once Jongin’s asleep, how about that?”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo turns to him, endeared. He gives him a quick kiss on the lips as a thank you, and they stay like that for a while.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jongin comes home with rice and a vegetable slurry Kyungsoo absolutely hates. He stares at it with disdain as he pushes it about his plate.</p><p> </p><p>“Come on, Jagi,” Jongin persuades, eating his slop portion. “This is good for you.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo gives it a small bite, and while it doesn’t make him puke, he couldn’t help the little disgruntled huff through his nose. The only good thing about the whole ordeal is that whatever Kyungsoo eats, his two partners eat as well.</p><p> </p><p>Jongin, damn him, is actually into this healthy shit. Being a model does that. And Chanyeol, with a stomach made of leather, just eats anything.</p><p> </p><p>“It doesn’t taste like anything, Jagi,” Kyungsoo complains.</p><p> </p><p>“That’s ‘cause it contains no MSG!” Jongin says proudly.</p><p> </p><p>“It contains no salt either.” Kyungsoo drops his utensils on the table.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol is familiar with his partners. Bad-tasting food puts Kyungsoo in a bad mood, but Jongin isn’t going to back down soon either. Accordingly, before Kyungsoo can throw a tantrum, he grabs the carriers hand and with it, his attention.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol pulls at his fingers a little. “So there’s this couple’s yoga they have at a gym downtown, every Saturday. I was thinking–”</p><p> </p><p>“No,” Kyungsoo alarms. <em>No, he can’t have his Saturdays taken from him.</em></p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>No Saturdays mean no CCCs. No CCCs mean no more of those lovely brownies.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>“No?”</p><p> </p><p>“No,” Kyungsoo repeats, with much more conviction. “I already have yoga, Chanyeol.”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol rolls his eyes. “Yeah, but this is <em>couples</em> yoga. We can do it together!”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo pushes his plate away, making Jongin frown. “Then go with Jongin.”</p><p> </p><p>“Jongin isn’t the one pregnant, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol says as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “They’re parental yoga classes. Besides, Jongin doesn’t exactly have a consistent workweek.”</p><p> </p><p>Jongin hums at this. He puts a finger on his lips contemplatively. “I only have a schedule in the morning this Saturday, though. I can come with you if you want.”</p><p> </p><p>“Again,” Chanyeol sighs, “Jongin, you’re not pregnant.”</p><p> </p><p>The model shrugs. “I don’t see how that should be an issue.”</p><p> </p><p>“It’s pregnant yoga for pregnant people.”</p><p> </p><p>“We are pregnant, we made the baby together. Us, as a collective.”</p><p> </p><p>“Kyungsoo’s pregnant. He’s the one with the baby. We just shot the sperm.”</p><p> </p><p>“Wow, Chanyeol. Way to make it all so romantic.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo feels a headache coming on.</p><p> </p><p>Jongin wonders of Chanyeol is too stupid to get it.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol is trying to stomp on the desire to pull his hair out.</p><p> </p><p>“All I’m saying,” Chanyeol declares with finality. Kyungsoo doesn’t like that finality. The finality means that Chanyeol has finally decided on it and that’s final, “is that we should go on one session. <em>One</em>. And if you don’t like it, you can go back to doing yoga all by your lonesome.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo doesn’t even consider it. “No,” he says, because he knows how weak he is for Chanyeol. He stands, putting both the food and conversation behind him.</p><p> </p><p>He knows that if he gives Chanyeol an inch, he’ll take a mile. If he goes to one session, he’ll go to all of them. (He did once say to himself back in college that he’ll go to one date with Chanyeol and Jongin. <em>One. </em>And here he is, several years later, pregnant with their child.)</p><p> </p><p>So he walks away to their room, pulling the one card that <em>always works</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol follows because the conversation isn’t done.</p><p> </p><p>Jongin follows because neither is the food.</p><p> </p><p>And if they found Kyungsoo already naked and opening himself up with two fingers… <em>well</em>, no one was really sad about that.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>No one was really sad about the fact that Sehun and Baekhyun got together back in highschool. So what if Baekhyun was a carrier two years Sehun’s senior back then? So what if Sehun had been too young to even know what a carrier really was?</p><p> </p><p>None of that changed the fact that Sehun loved his hyung a little too much, and that Baekhyun was gone even before he knew it.</p><p> </p><p>It doesn’t matter anymore, more than a decade later and they’re together in ages much more accepted in boring, uptight, conservative society.</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun giggles. It’s another Thursday night – which means it’s it time to employ <em>Get Sehun to sleep with him plan #204</em>. He doesn’t know what actual number he’s on, and he’s practically constantly made these plans since Sehun turned 18, but <em>eh</em>. It’s all fair in love and war and when Baekhyun is terribly, horrendously, horny.</p><p> </p><p>Although, since everything else he’s done has failed, he’s opted to the simplest suggestion he’s ever been given.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>It’s foolproof</em>,” Kyungsoo promised just this morning, still in bed and apparently unable to get up. “<em>Sehun might not be as simple-minded as my two imbeciles, but you’re pretty enough to pull it off. Trust me.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>And Baekhyun can’t deny that, can he? He is goddamn pretty.</p><p> </p><p>So with a few rose petals on the floor and blinking fairy lights on the walls, Baekhyun gets on the bed with nothing but a robe and waits.</p><p> </p><p>Sehun comes home in a few minutes, right on time, as always.</p><p> </p><p>The carrier giggles as he hears Sehun calls his name. Usually, Sehun would be coming home to dinner of Thursdays. Baekhyun has been trying to learn how to cook since they found out they were pregnant, a sense of wanting to provide suddenly there that wasn’t so apparent when it was just him and Sehun. But tonight, Baekhyun took the time to prepare himself in an ambiance Sehun surely cannot brush off.</p><p> </p><p>So when Sehun enters the room with his name on his lips, a gasp and a question all at once, Baekhyun carefully propped himself on his knees and undid the know of his silk robe.</p><p> </p><p>“I was thinking,” he says with a wink, “that you can have me for dinner instead.”</p><p> </p><p>The smooth red fabric drops from his shoulders at the same time Sehun’s jaw does.</p><p> </p><p>Sehun smiles after a few terse seconds, and suddenly Baekhyun feels cold. Sehun’s a little too obviously uncomfortable. The shock feels like a rock just dropped in Baekhyun’s stomach.</p><p> </p><p>“Babe–” Sehun, tries.</p><p> </p><p>But they’ve done this so many times before. Baekhyun no longer needed to hear the words to hear the rejection. It leaves a vile taste in his mouth, the way rejection is so achingly familiar now.</p><p> </p><p>“I get it,” he says. The change in demeanor is instant. He slides his clothes back on. “You don’t want to. You never do.”</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun is so <em>fucking </em>embarrassed.</p><p> </p><p>Sehun is beside him suddenly, offering a hand on his lap.</p><p> </p><p>“Babe, it’s not like that,” he tries. His voice is tight and anxious. “You didn’t even let me say anything.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah? Were you going to say yes, then?”</p><p> </p><p><em>God</em>, Baekhyun thinks, <em>when did he get so tired?</em></p><p> </p><p>Because the thing is, Sehun pauses. The thing is, he can’t look at Baekhyun straight. The thing is, it’s never actually a yes.</p><p> </p><p>“Let me suck you off,” Sehun whispers in his ear. “Or I can eat you out, would you like that, baby?”</p><p> </p><p>Sehun glides a hand on his lower back, then runs his fingers up his spine. It makes Baekhyun quiver with want. Sehun had always found it easy to know just where to touch him.</p><p> </p><p>But it isn’t what Baekhyun wants. He has no idea why Sehun won’t give him what he wants and he’s just… Baekhyun’s just so done with it all.</p><p> </p><p>So he stands, ignoring all of Sehun’s call if only to say that he’s going to order pizza and watch reruns of Keeping Up with the Kardashians on the couch. ‘Cause clearly, taking care of his physical self hadn’t been enough for Sehun, so he needs a little bit of emotional therapy through greasy food and greasier TV.</p><p> </p><p>He answers Sehun with one-word answers, and answers the door just as he is. With his robe opened at the chest, and its hem barely covering lower than his mid-thigh.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s shorts barely go past his mid-thighs. They’re loose, undeniably comfy for the carrier, but it irks Chanyeol to the bone.</p><p> </p><p>The weather has been getting colder everyday, but more than that, he never really liked it when Kyungsoo showed too much skin.</p><p> </p><p>(Not that Kyungsoo really showed much skin to begin with, so whenever he wore anything that was cut above his knees, people seem to unconsciously pay attention.)</p><p> </p><p>He loves Kyungsoo, he does. There is no one prouder than Chanyeol to have Kyungsoo as a partner, not even Jongin, and Chanyeol is confident enough that Jongin feels the same way as him.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol and Jongin are great. They were together first – the hot freshman campus couple back in university. With them, it’s fun and easy, bright and happy. Then they meet Kyungsoo and they suddenly realize that there’s been something missing all along. It was messy and complicated, there’d been a lot of tears and it hurt the three of them more than they could have ever been prepared for, but that’s all behind them.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo provided them with answers to questions they were too afraid to ask. And it all worked out to the end.</p><p> </p><p>Now the sad days are behind them and Chanyeol was adamant to keep it that way.</p><p> </p><p>So when he sees Kyungsoo give some rando a hug and hops into his car, Chanyeol clenches his fist and does his best to keep his anger in line.</p><p> </p><p>He <em>knew</em> it had been suspicious that Kyungsoo started to be so diligently going to yoga every week when he hated sweating. He even hated it when he was in the kitchen – and Kyungsoo <em>loves</em> cooking almost as much as he loves eating. He also <em>knew</em> that Kyungsoo was not the most sociable person out there. So when he started talking to some other person on the phone, it set off several red flags. It never helped that whenever Chanyeol would catch him, he’d put down the call immediately and brush off any question as to who that was.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol <em>knows</em> Kyungsoo. And he’s less inclined to think that Kyungsoo is cheating on them (please, have you seen Chanyeol? Have you seen <em>Jongin</em>? Jongin is a god among men) and more on the possibility that this Mercedes-driving asshole was likely manipulating Kyungsoo. He probably lured the carrier to his car with chocolate cake. Chanyeol has first-hand experience. Kyungsoo will do almost anything for chocolate cake.</p><p> </p><p>So Chanyeol pulls out his phone as he pulls out of the curb. With determined brows and with all the James Bond movies backing him up, he trails them.</p><p> </p><p>“Jongin,” he says, once the phone stops ringing, “call the police. We’re gonna need back-up.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They don’t call the police but, “We’re gonna need back-up,” Jongin reasons as he flies the car as much as one can fly a car through the city streets.</p><p> </p><p>Oh Sehun sits besides him, exasperated and tired, fists clutched around his seatbelt. “I got that,” he says, though he doesn’t actually. “What I don’t get is why the back-up has to be me.”</p><p> </p><p>“Friends don’t let friends attack their pregnant boyfriend’s kidnapper alone, Sehun!”</p><p> </p><p>Sehun stares at him. He can feel the horrid look on his own face. “Then call the police!” he tries. It’s futile, he’s aware. He has no fucking idea how Jongin’s mind works. “Jesus Christ, will you slow down?!”</p><p> </p><p>“My baby-carrier and baby-baby are in danger. I can’t slow down?” Jongin rationalizes. He put the pedal to the metal; Sehun literally feels his soul get left behind as they beat the third red light in a row.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m going to die. I’m going to die,” Sehun chants. “I’m not ready to die, Jongin. I’ve got two mouths to feed.”</p><p> </p><p>Sehun knew Jongin was trouble the first time he walked through the agency’s double doors. A guy with a face as magnetic and a body as alluring as his didn’t just walk around without a catch.</p><p> </p><p>Still, “I didn’t sign-up for this. This is way past my job description. I’m your manager, not some lifesaver!! My own marriage is falling apart how do you expect me to save your boyfriend from some lunatic who lured him with dessert?”</p><p> </p><p>In moments that feel like death is impending, experts suggest that one’s life flashes before their eyes. It’s with that hypothesis that Sehun comforts himself within seconds because, for all intents and purposes, Sehun’s life does <em>not</em> flash before his eyes. In fact, he feels as if his being was split in two: one being in the seat, holding on for dear life, and the other with his soul, left somewhere in the back, tethered by a fine line of twine.</p><p> </p><p>He watches himself as he experiences himself.</p><p> </p><p>It’s oddly mystifying.</p><p> </p><p>“This isn’t happening; this isn’t happening,” he denies. “We are not racing through a sea of cars just to hunt down your pregnant boyfriend who may or may not be kidnapped by several armed men.”</p><p> </p><p>“Jongin!” he cries, instantly angered. “What the fuck, take me home! At least stop the car so I can get down, holy shit, are you insane?!”</p><p> </p><p>It washes over him just as instantaneously. He bargains, “You can let me down and call the police? Please. And when you get arrested for over-speeding, I promise to send your mugshot to brands all over the world. The bad boy look is in again, we can make something out of it, maybe a documentary about car chasing and the necessity of the rate of distance over time, what do you say?”</p><p> </p><p>“I can’t die yet, Jongin-ah,” he hears himself continue. His tethered existence watches a tear fall from one of his eyes, like it does in one of those drama movies. “I need to make it up to my husband somehow. I need to see my baby grow. I don’t want to die, yet. I have so much to live for.”</p><p> </p><p>Maybe Sehun’s life did flash before his eyes. Maybe it was sunlight. Maybe it was the watery sheen of tears. It has to be something ‘cause when he blinks, he’s suddenly calm, numb… <em>resigned. </em>“This is it, isn’t it? This is karma. This is how I repent for all my sins and for all the pain I caused Baekhyun? I don’t know why it has to be with Jongin but Jongin is his own type of torture.”</p><p> </p><p>Jongin, of all <em>goddamned </em>people, rolls his eyes and says, “Dude, you’re being overdramatic.”</p><p> </p><p>Maybe Sehun is wrong. Maybe he’s already died and gone to hell.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>This is hell. He’s sure. There’s no other word for it. There can be no other word for it. If god and angels do exist, then so must hell.</p><p> </p><p>Hell looks awfully lot like a baby blue off-the-shoulder frilly bathing suit, and the Devil bears a striking resemblance to Baekhyun in a red bikini.</p><p> </p><p>“You don’t have to be shy, Soo-yah,” Baekhyun says as he’s pulling the shorter carrier to the backyard. “You’re very very charming!”</p><p> </p><p>“Be careful on the stairs, you two!” Junmyeon scolds, sounding every bit ready to become a parent. He’s wearing a white one-piece halter top swimsuit of his own. It fits him so well.</p><p> </p><p>They’re in the Kims’ backyard, a small pool slightly to the side. It’s April’s birthday and there was an intimate pool party for the girl and the carriers. Minseok and Yixing are setting up a kiddie pool, since their actual pool was too deep yet for the child.</p><p> </p><p>The CCC collectively decided that they needed a relaxing day off. Well, as relaxing as aqua yoga is with Yixing. The man had insisted after reading one article on the internet, and after the whole candle episode, Jumyeon was too scared to be sacrificed to Azathoth to say no. It probably didn’t help that Jongdae wanted to try aqua yoga and Baekhyun wanted to be in a bikini.</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae pauses from arranging the food on the long table. He’s been doing that for fifteen minutes. In another three, he’s going to take about four-dozen pictures. He whistles. “Hot damn, Soo! I didn’t know you had it in you.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo glares at Jongdae. Jongdae’s swimsuit is a long-sleeved black one, high on the hips and low on the chest and back. In the back of Kyungsoo’s mind, he wonders if this is actually age-appropriate for a child’s birthday party, but he remembers that April isn’t his child and he doesn’t have energy to spare anyway.</p><p> </p><p>The doorbell rings and April squeals. Minseok laughs at his daughter.</p><p> </p><p>“That must be the pizza,” Junmyeon says, but it is Yixing who stands up and volunteers to greet the delivery man.</p><p> </p><p>Minseok stands too, April in his arms. “Why don’t we get you dressed?” he suggests. “The sooner we’re ready, the sooner we can eat cake!”</p><p> </p><p>April nods vigorously. “I want to dress up like eomma!” she screams.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>When Minseok first proposed to him the idea of a Carrier Support Group, Jongdae thought it was ridiculous. They were having their second baby, for Christ’s sake, he didn’t need any more hand-holding the second time around.</p><p> </p><p>But, as with all things, Jongdae learned that it was the right decision after all. He <em>likes</em> hanging out with his new friends. Kyungsoo is endearing, Baekhyun is fun, and Junmyeon is funny (not his jokes, God no. The other things, though. Junmyeon is hilariously unfortunate in some aspects of his life).</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon and Baekhyun are bobbing with him in their pool. They’re cute, like the round rubber balls April likes to bring with her in her baths. The pool’s water is new and warm, and Yixing is dripping as he guides Kyungsoo down the slippery pool steps.</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon’s husband is a looker: abs and lean muscle. Jongdae appreciates the sight. Of course, he appreciates Minseok’s more compact frame, but he appreciates it nonetheless. They’re all giggling by the time Kyungsoo’s gently bounced his way over to them. He can never understand the way his heart goes soft for their cutest carrier. The water reaches up just to his shoulders and it’s downright captivating.</p><p> </p><p>It’s a perfect day. He has perfect friends. And the warmth of the water is just as perfect.</p><p> </p><p>“KYUNGSOO!!” a loud voice boomed over the perfectness. “I’M GOING TO SAVE YOU!”</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae sighs. <em>Ah, perfect</em>.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon can always remember – never forget – in full detail what happens next.</p><p> </p><p>A tall man, clad in all black, barges in their solitude from side of the house and tackles Yixing into the pool. It happens so quickly and slowly at the same time. The stranger wraps his arms around Yixing’s waist and brings them flying over the ledge. Junmyeon’s heart stops ‘cause they’re heading straight at him.</p><p> </p><p>He’s frozen – absolutely frozen as they descend– until Kyungsoo pulls him back by the lean straps of his suit. They get out of the way just in time and the wave created pushes them back further. The next thing he knows, his back is against the wall.</p><p> </p><p>He’s screaming, calling Yixing’s name as a struggle ensues underwater. Kyungsoo is shielding him, and Jongdae and Baekhyun are cowering in the far corner of the pool.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>There’s a lot of splashing. It makes Kyungsoo panic until the two men finally emerge over water.</p><p> </p><p>Then it’s replaced with unbridled rage.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol surfaces, still wrestling with Junmyeon’s husband. It makes Kyungsoo shake to the core.</p><p> </p><p>“Chanyeol,” he screams, but for the most part, it’s futile. “Chanyeol! What are you doing?! Chanyeol!”</p><p> </p><p>He wants to stop it; he actually tries to. It’s a good thing Junmyeon holds him back from approaching two flailing grown-ass men. Lord, this is so embarrassing. Kyungsoo’s eyebrows twitch in irritation. Chanyeol’s always been embarrassing, but what’s more is that he actually looks like he’s <em>losing</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo groans and buries his face in his hands. He guesses he can kiss CCC goodbye.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Okay.</p><p> </p><p>Okay.</p><p> </p><p>Call Baekhyun <em>a little </em>crazy, but after the initial shock, it was all just kinda sorta funny and maybe a tad hot. Like, come on, two hot dudes wrestling in the water? Who didn’t think that’s hot?</p><p> </p><p>Yixing isn’t even saying anything, just expertly deflecting blows and managing to make his attacker angrier by the second. It’s mere out of respect for Kyungsoo’s anger and Junmyeon’s worry that Baekhyun doesn’t laugh out loud.</p><p> </p><p>Then, much to Baekhyun’s bewilderment (amusement), a new stranger comes rushing in… with Sehun in tow?</p><p> </p><p>“Yeollie! Back up’s here!” he announces over Kyungsoo’s frantic shouts of <em>Jongin? What? WHAT? </em>It must take severe talent or stupidity to wave of Kyungsoo’s righteous concern with, “Don’t worry, jagi! I’ll save you!”</p><p> </p><p>It’s like a scene from a movie. All the shouts, all the noise, gets muted out as Jongin strips. Elegant lines of muscles under beautifully tanned skin, his hair dances in the wind like he’s from a shampoo commercial and when he runs and dives, Baekhyun feels like he’s watching the opening sequence for Baywatch.</p><p> </p><p>The eroticism ends there and he jumps into the fray like a five-year-old.</p><p> </p><p>His husband’s hair is disheveled. His eyes are frantic, lines on his face clear in its stress.</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun is haughty. “Better get in, honey. Gotta stop ‘em before someone gets a black eye.”</p><p> </p><p>That spurs him into action from his frozen state, and Sehun – bless him – actually takes off his shirt, shoes, and watch before more carefully jumping in.</p><p> </p><p>There’s lot of shouting.</p><p> </p><p>Someone goes, “This is him, Nini! This is the fucker who abducted our Soo!”</p><p> </p><p>There’s, “Stop! Stop!! If my model gets a bruise <em>anywhere</em>, I will skin all of you alive.”</p><p> </p><p>In the middle of it all, it’s cute and not at all threatening, “You hurt our Soo, you get what’s coming to you – – Yixing??”</p><p> </p><p>Then, curiously, in a way only Yixing can say, he laughs, “Oh, hi Nini! Are you having fun?”</p><p> </p><p>They don’t stop. Logically, they should. But Chanyeol is relentless, and Yixing is doing nothing to stop him. He might actually be encouraging it. Jongin is trying to stop them both, but Sehun is trying to stop Jongin. It’s all quite a doozy until Minseok comes running in.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn’t scream. He doesn’t ask. He just runs in and joins the fight – all five-foot something of him against four other bigger men.</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae, the ever-loving husband, has a wicked grin on his mouth. “That’s it, baby! Fight them! Fight them!!”</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun would have been a little bit scared if he weren’t so entertained.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He loves them. He wouldn’t know what to do without them. He doesn’t want to raise his baby alone. He doesn’t want to go to jail for double homicide. He loves them.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>That’s the chant Kyungsoo repeats under his breath, quiet enough to speak to his dark soul but loud enough for anyone near to hear. See, there are a number of theories as to why a carrier like Kyungsoo managed to bag two guys as gorgeous as Jongin and Chanyeol.</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae thinks that it’s cause Kyungsoo was too cute for either of them so they had to band forces if only to get to Kyungsoo’s level.</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun thinks that they’re the human example of commercial two-for-the-price-of-one deals.</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon just thinks that God made a tiny bit of a slip up when he put Chanyeol and Jongin in the same timeline and so created Kyungsoo as recourse.</p><p> </p><p>None of them are wrong.</p><p> </p><p>“What the ever loving fuck were you both thinking?!” the cute carrier hysterically demands. His tiny hands are on his tiny belly. “Why are you here? <em>How</em> did you find me?”</p><p> </p><p>The pool boys – as Junmyeon has taken to call them – are all in line before the carriers in a single file, hands stiff at their side and in attention. None of them even have an ounce of doubt in their mind that Kyungsoo’s children will behave badly.</p><p> </p><p>“I followed you,” Chanyeol says, as if it was the simplest thing in the world.</p><p> </p><p>Scratch that. There may be <em>some</em> doubt.</p><p> </p><p>“Why?!”</p><p> </p><p>“‘Cause you were being kidnapped and manipulated!”</p><p> </p><p>As inevitable as Chanyeol or Jongin messing up.</p><p> </p><p>The man actually makes a fist and puffs his chest. Kyungsoo sighs the heaviest sighs known to mankind. “Chanyeol, do I look like I’m being kidnapped?</p><p> </p><p>For the first time, Jongin and Chanyeol take a careful look at Kyungsoo’s bare shoulders and overexposed legs. The both of them visibly redden. They are simple men with simple desires.</p><p> </p><p>“W-well… you look like you’ve been manipulated into that swimsuit.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo’s nostrils flare. Baekhyun preens with pride.</p><p> </p><p>“I-it looks good on you, though! Can we keep it? You’ll be cold, but I can keep you warm.”</p><p> </p><p>“Thin ice, Chanyeol.”</p><p> </p><p>The tallest among all of them sigh. “Look, you’ve been acting strange lately, okay? You won’t let me come with you to your yoga classes and you won’t tell me who you’ve been talking to on the phone!” He points an accusing finger at Yixing. “Is this him? Is this Baekhyun?!”</p><p> </p><p>“No, I’m Baekhyun,” Baekhyun says.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol gives him a once over. “Okay, no offense, but you don’t look like you can kidnap anyone.”</p><p> </p><p>Sehun steps out of the line. “Dude, full offense, my husband can do anything.”</p><p> </p><p>“Shut up, Sehun. I’m still mad at you,” Baekhyun snarls. Sehun steps back into line. “Full offense, but I can do anything… I can even <em>Do(h) Kyungsoo</em>.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Baek</em>,” Kyungsoo warns, but Baekhyun laughs like he doesn’t care.</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol has the audacity to look at him suspiciously. He turns to Yixing. “Are you sure you’re not Baekhyun?”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sure I’m Yixing,” Yixing offers good-naturedly, right at the same time as Jongin says, “Yeah, babe, that’s Yixing!”</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon cocks his head, marveled at the coincidence. He shouldn’t be. “You know each other?”</p><p> </p><p>Yixing grins a grin that stays on even at the end of the world. “You got that right, Sunshine! Jongin’s even the one who told me to put salt and pepper in your tea.”</p><p> </p><p>There’s a pause. Junmyeon eyes engage in a series of blinks that is far from normal.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry, what?” Junmyeon twitches.</p><p> </p><p>“I never told you that!” Jongin denies.</p><p> </p><p>Yixing shakes his head. His pride is out of place. “Yeah, man. You said putting salt and pepper will make anything taste better!”</p><p> </p><p>Jongin cannot deny <em>that</em>. Yixing pushes on, “You even told me to only give Junmyeon healthy food because it’s what carriers need!”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh my God,” Jongdae says, as if watching a drama on TV.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh my God,” Baekhyun says, as if he’s a schoolgirl with her friends sharing the latest gossip.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh my God,” Junmyeon says, as if his life is crumbling before him.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh my God,” Kyungsoo says, as if he’s finally accepted fate that maybe life in prison wouldn’t be so bad; at least life in prison means a life away from the two.</p><p> </p><p>“Dude! That’s not what I meant; you put salt in the food, not the drinks!”</p><p> </p><p>Yixing only shrugs. “Well, you could have said that!”</p><p> </p><p>Jongin turns to Kyungsoo. “Okay, so we can at least establish that <em>I</em> am not at fault–”</p><p> </p><p>“Can it.” Kyungsoo shushes him. “If you hadn’t been policing my food too much then I wouldn’t have tried to escape every Saturday to the people who actually love me in the first place.”</p><p> </p><p>There’s a collective coo.</p><p> </p><p>“My sisters said you need to eat nutritious food, Kyungsoo!”</p><p> </p><p>“None of your sisters have been pregnant, Jongin! They haven’t even been to an OB-Gyn! I have!”</p><p> </p><p>Yet Jongin stands his ground, resolve slowly breaking down.</p><p> </p><p>“What else have you been saying, huh?” Kyunsgoo challenges. “You giving everyone wrong pregnancy advice now?”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>NO!</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Sehun jolts. Something hits the back of his head – metaphorically. Something clicks in his mind. It sounds dreadfully like a cocked and loaded gun. “Dude, you said, and I quote ‘<em>you shouldn’t have sex during pregnancy, Sehun, it’s not good for the baby. Trust me, I have two sisters.</em>’”</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun and Kyungsoo gasp.</p><p> </p><p>To be fair, it’s a fair mimic. It does nothing to quell Baekhyun’s anger.</p><p> </p><p>He says one word. He says, “<em>You!</em>” and promptly pushes Jongin on the chest like he’s nothing.</p><p>Jongin trips over his own two feet and with the grace of a flightless bird he falls back into the pool mercilessly.</p><p> </p><p>Sehun raises his hands. “Baby, I’m so sorry–”</p><p> </p><p>But by that time, there were no tears. There’s no ugly frown on Baekhyun’s face – there can never be anything ugly on Baekhyun’s face.</p><p> </p><p>“You made me beg,” Baekhyun simply says, fire eyes and manic smile. “You made me upset, all because you’d rather listen to your friend than me. You made me feel unpretty.” He steps closer. His fingers trace Sehun’s clavicle then splay on the vast, unclothed expanse of Sehun’s chest. Baekhyun pushes. Sehun falls and no one saves him as he momentarily drowns. “No one can make feel unpretty, Sehu. Not even you.”</p><p> </p><p>The spectacle ignites a spark in Junmyeon. He’s been enduring for so long, holding all his inhibitions in fear of hurting Yixing’s feelings. Yet, if this is the real cause… if the reason for his needless stress was actually Yixing’s gullibility–</p><p> </p><p>“Do you worship C’thulhu, Yixing?” Junmyeon asks. He steps closer. His dim-witted husband knows no better.</p><p> </p><p>Yixing shakes his head in confusion, stirring the agitated cauldron of emotions inside Junmyeon, already full to the brim.</p><p> </p><p>Junmyeon pushes him in too, body shaking in disbelief. “You better start praying, Honeyboo,” he says menacingly. “You’re gonna wish you were as I make you pay for everything you put me through!”</p><p> </p><p>Chanyeol sees the pattern, knows it’s coming without ostentation. Caught with no preparation in a station of failed expectations. He supposes that’s his reparation, for ruining a child’s birthday celebration.</p><p> </p><p>And as he’s spitting rhymes in his head, Kyungsoo shoulders him into the gut with a scoff. He didn’t need to berate him anymore. Chanyeol knows what he did. In the good chance that he doesn’t, Kyungsoo will have him make it on his own later on, which will be another form of torture for the impatient man-child.</p><p> </p><p>Not even a half-second later there is a fifth and final splash. A cursory look to the side shows Jongdae with his arms out in front of him and Minseok’s body missing from the ledge.</p><p> </p><p>They look at him, eyes none judging, and their host just shrugs. “That’s what he gets, you know? I wanted to be in on the fun, too.”</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo doesn’t feel sorry for him. Kyungsoo definitely doesn’t feel sorry for any of them.</p><p> </p><p>(Not even too-perfect Minseok who didn’t really do anything, since that’s what Jongdae wants. Anything Jongdae wants, Kyungsoo will let him have. He secretly likes Jongdae as much as Jongdae likes him too.)</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>In a one-story house in the suburbs, lights streams in from a picture window, arched at the top to give a very fairytale feel. It’s nestled next to a cushioned ledge, the dream of every book-reader: from the perfect lighting to the comfort, added with beautiful scenery.</p><p> </p><p>Today, it’s empty. The fairytale is rather corrupted today. For beyond the window and behind the house, lies a scenery unusual to many.</p><p> </p><p>Four carriers lie on their backs, in lounge chairs, shaded from the sun by sunglasses, and served like royalty by five other men practically half-naked.</p><p> </p><p>Jongdae made Minseok wear his mesh shirt, and Kyungsoo made Chanyeol wear Minseok’s white tank top that was overall too tight and made his nipples poke through.</p><p> </p><p>And in the midst of it all, Sehun had the courage to crouch before his King and kneel. “So I know you’re still mad and all,” he says, barely above a whisper because Yixing was already having a hard time keeping up with his husband’s new-found rage and no one wanted to get caught in the cross-fire, “but since it’s apparently safe to have sex, maybe I can atone for all of my mistakes to you tonight?”</p><p> </p><p>Baekhyun tips his shades down with a delicate finger. He eyes the beads of sweat that roll down the body he’s craved for <em>weeks</em>.</p><p> </p><p>He scoffs. While Junmyeon mercilessly stirs salt and pepper into the punch and makes Yixing drink it, while Kyungsoo makes Chanyeol rub his shoulders and Jongin rub his feet, and while Jongdae is gleefully testing the limits of Minseok’s accommodation, Baekhyun thinks… well, he can’t be the only one slacking off, can he?</p><p> </p><p>“I’m going to make you suffer, Hunnie,” he says, making sure that everyone hears. He pushes his shades in place and lies back down. “I’ll make you suffer so much, you’d join your own Crackbrained Cum-donor’s Crew.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>April was inside all the while, checked on by Minseok every now and then, watching Disney princess movies on repeat and eating all the cake and pizza she wanted. </p><p>It was a wonderful birthday, overall.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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